Only Me...

I ran the Seattle Marathon on Sunday morning, and now, 24 hours later, I feel great. I really do. Absolutely fabulous. Just as long as I have at least 2 ibuprofen in my bloodstream and I'm not moving, then sure. I feel great.

There were seven of us runner-friends who traveled down to Seattle to run. I drove the van, and we only just about died once. Some moron wouldn't let me change three lanes at the same time to cut him off and take an exit. Obnoxious, eh?

I was the only one signed up to run the full marathon; the rest of the runners were signed up for the half. However, once we had all stayed up WAY too late on Saturday night, I felt run-down and sick to my stomach, and so I decided to run the half marathon instead.

Since it was too late to switch to the half on race day morning, I decided to just pin my full marathon bib on and put on my full marathon timing chip so I could at least prove that I paid for my registration.

Mark, Gord and I stuck together for the first 7km until a fork in the road steered halfers one way, and fulls the other. Since I had felt quite fresh once I started running, I thought I would ask a race marshall if I can just go ahead and take the full route.

Now, this is important: The reason that I would have to ask someone for permission is because the full marathon did not start until 45 minutes AFTER the half marathon had started.

So, I asked someone and she kinda shrugged and replied, "SURE!"

Off I went.

All by myself.

I ran all by myself for the next 23 kilometres.

I did not think about the implications of my decision until I hit the half-way point. All of a sudden, as I realized what was about to happen, I was filled with dread.

You see, the elite marathoners finish their race at around 2 hours and 30 minutes. They would hit the halfway point at 1 hour and 15 minutes. I hit MY halfway point at 1 hour 50 minutes, which means I had about 10 minutes before the elite would come up behind me with police escorts and sirens.

Yes, yes. This really happened. *sigh*

So off went my music and up went my anxiety. Waaaay up.

I shoulder-checked and ran backwards until finally I heard the sirens, at which point I just stepped off the race course and watched them all run by me. Gobs and gobs of extremely fast marathoners. These people are machines.

When I would see a large gap, I would hop back onto the course, and shoulder-check and run backwards some more, until I'd see more runners and then I'd hop back off.

Repeat 10,000,000,000,000 times.

And you know what would happen when I'd be on the race course? Crowds of people would cheer and shout, "Here comes the first WOMAN! THE FIRST WOMAN!!! ALL RIGHT!!! WAY TO GO!!!" Cheer cheer hooray hooray yay yay.

Meanwhile I would be making the "no, no, no-cut it out" motion with my hands. And then I would tell them that, "I started early."

Repeat 10,000,000,000,000 times.

This is a HUGE city race. These elite runners are dead serious. They win money.

So at this point I decided to just stop at an aid station and chat it up with some people. They were all friendly and they laughed along with me at my awkward situation as they ladled fresh Gatorade into the cups and lined them up on the table.

I sat and drank some Gatorade, laughed and chit-chatted, fixed my shoes, put some vaseline on my blisters. And then. AND THEN. I tossed my empty Gatorade cup into a giant 100 Litre container of fresh Gatorade, thinking that it was a garbage can.

And then I ran while I tried not to cry. I was HUMILIATED.

The elite women passed, and more and more runners went by me as well until I could eventually get back into a running rhythm. I still got told things like, "You're fourth in your category! The next woman is just around that corner! Go catch her!"

At this point I turned my music back on because I couldn't stand telling any more people that I STARTED EARLY!!!!!!

All in all, it was a great race because a) I had great friends supporting me, b) It is good fitness-maintenance for pre-Boston training and c) I think I came in fourth place and now I'm going to be on the cover of running magazines (they might need to spend a year or two photo-shopping my thighs, though).

I'm still shaking my head in disbelief...

Questions

Apparently I have no sense of writing style and so I make lists:

1) Why would the raw chicken juice spill directly down between the kitchen counter/cupboards and the oven? Why not splash across the counter top where it can be easily wiped with bleach? Am I really expected to pull the oven out and wipe everything down? Really?

2) Why would one of my children do a toot in the teeny tiny physiotherapy room today? Was it because they resented the fact that I had dragged them all there with me?

3) Why do some people get skinny when they're stressed, and others get fatter? Our old cat, Steps, is going all "Kate Moss" because the kitten, Squirts, is annoying him to no end.

4) How am I supposed to run a marathon on Sunday with strep throat? Did you know that the strep bacteria is found in two (testable) places on the human body: the throat, and the rectum. So when someone has strep throat, they could technically say they have strep rectum. Don't quote me on that though. Please. Don't.

5) What should I do after I finish (technically... for *real*) my degree next week? What should I start? I have signed up for opera-singing lessons, and I want to write a book. And... I guess I'll be training for Boston. Never mind. No more suggestions please, unless they involve Starbucks and chocolate.

6) Should I switch from the full to the half marathon on Sunday? Or should I just treat the marathon like a training run and just lallygag? Enjoy the scenery... that type of thing. Yes, yes... that's what I'll do. I'll just be chill about it. I won't be measuring my banana. It won't be serious like that.

Wish me luck... with the raw chicken juice.

Ketchup

This is what I have been up to...

1) a) We had a wind/rain storm the other night that took out our power for 10 hours. It happened during the night, and because our children love us, they proceeded to scamper into our bed and sleep sideways over our bodies, digging little knobby joints and digits into our sad, aching torsos. We did not sleep more than 2 hours accumulated, 13 minutes consecutively.

b) School was canceled because of the power outage *right* before the power went back on. I didn't know the power went back on because I was in the Starbucks drive-thru in my jam-jams ordering two coffees. Both coffees were for me. I told the lady at the window that they were both for me and I told her why. I got free coffees. It pays to be grouchy.

2) I have my huge presentation coming up on Monday night. I'm excited and scared and nauseous, all at the same time. Speaking of excited and scared and nauseous, the reason that I switched my presentation to *this* Monday night rather than on November 30th, is because...

3) I signed up for the Seattle Marathon. Lora and I are driving down, meeting some runner friends and staying over in Seattle on the Saturday. The race is on Sunday morning, the 29th, and then we'll head home. By ambulance. After being resuscitated. And having limbs sewn back on.

4) I have no idea how I can run as fast as I can when my diet consists purely of chocolate chip cookies and egg-nog lattes, and when my running style is so rotational. Maybe my huge hair creates drag, causing my hips to overcompensate in propelling me forward? Hmm....

5) I'd really like to find a great pair of jogging pants that are cute and flattering and comfy. Does such thing exist? I think that question will be right before the questions "why is there war?" and right after "what has Grandma been doing all this time?" that I will ask God when I get to heaven.

6) Do people still say, "jogging pants?" Or are they "yoga pants?" But I don't do yoga. I guess I don't jog in the jogging pants, so it would be okay to buy yoga pants if I don't do yoga. I'd just feel like a fake, you know?

There Is a First For Everything

I helped out in Running Dude's class this morning for an hour, and then I had exactly 45 minutes to go for a run before I had to pick up Running Princess from preschool. I was already wearing my running threads, so I grabbed my music and headed out the door. I got to the corner of our road (2 houses down) and stopped.

I didn't feel like running, and so I turned around and went home. I have NEVER done this before. EVER.

I stuck my clothes back in my running clothes drawer and had a hot shower instead.

I still can't believe that I didn't run. What were my reasons? Was I injured? Not enough time? Nope. I simply didn't feel like it.

I have told countless people that even though they don't feel like running, they will be glad that they did when they finish. I preach the power of running through amotivation with the same vigor that my mom would preach the power of attending church when "not feeling like it."

And here I sit in disbelief. I have no idea when I'll get a chance to run again today. I might not! Is my obsession turning into a hobby? Is my running identity morphing into a washed-up wannabe?

NO! *slamming fist onto desk*

(Cookie is hiding now)

I am still a runner and I am still a believer in the power of the Run. Maybe I am a little closer to normal than I thought.


Nahhh....

Haney To Harrison

I waited all this time to post about the race on Saturday because I wanted to post it with some pictures. However, the only picture in there of me is one where I am surrounded by a bunch of people who don't want their pictures on the internet. Well, I actually don't know that for sure. But I don't know them well enough to ask them if they'd mind.

Come to think of it, why are half a dozen people that I don't know in a picture with me in the first place? I guess it's because they knew that I would run that leg so fast that I would be famous by the end of the day.

Okay, okay. Maybe I'm not famous. But I sure did run that leg fast! And nobody would know it because for some reason the timing chip didn't work for us and so now we don't have a record of our times.

No pictures. No times. This is a great post.

I have no idea what I am doing right now. I'd love to run the Seattle marathon at the end of November, but that's the day before my big presentation. Oh, and I haven't exactly put in any long training runs for quite some time.

I'm thinking of running in a half marathon this Sunday morning in Vancouver called the "Fall Classic." I have always wanted to run that race because they hand out these geeky-cute running tights with maple leafs splashed on the thigh area.

I don't like wearing tights, but if I have to wear them, I may as well wear some with maple leafs. Is it leaves or leafs?

You're really wishing there were some pictures to look at right about now, eh?

Here... I found one. These are NOT my legs.

You're welcome.

Peace Out

So... I graduated, sure, but I still have this one.last.course I'm taking. It's a Human Kinetics course called "Senior Seminar" and it's more or less a bit of prep for grad school.

I'm so incredibly cool with my polka-dot thermos of tea and my funky little Nikes and skater tees. I fit in among the 21 year-olds soooo well. Just me and them. Pals, we are. Chums.

And then one of the punks students found out how old I was, and he yelled incredulously... "you were born in the SEVENTIES??? HA ha ha ha!!!"

It's okay. Really. I don't mind.

*cough*

I have a pretty large research project due at the end of November and it includes a 25-page research paper, plus a half hour presentation of my research on the day that I hand my paper in. I am really quite pumped about my topic:

"Exercise can be used as a tool in the alleviation of some of the symptoms of depression."

That's my topic.

Yay! Right? Yay. My heart is pulled more toward the benefits of exercise for anxiety and stress management, but most of the information that I found out there was done on depressed individuals. However, a lot of the symptoms of depression can be found in healthy-minded individuals as well, and exercise can certainly be used to bring some relief and balance in the body. ***see note below***

*yawn* You with me?

So that's what I'm doing. If something jumps out at me and I feel compelled to share, I just might. And if anyone out there has any questions for me about this subject matter, I certainly have gobs of resources that I can send your way!

*** I feel compelled to mention that although I believe that exercise is a powerful tool in alleviating symptoms of depression, I will never underestimate the power of modern medicine and psychotherapy.

Whew. I love disclaimers.

Escape

Hi everyone! We made it through the sickness and everyone is healthy(ish) now. Thanks for your thoughts and prayers! They must really work. Imagine that.

I was able to escape the sicky house on Saturday and run around Fort Langley with a few friends. We ran along the Ft to Ft Trail to Derby Reach, through an off-leash dog park, (did you HEAR that? We ran through an OFF-leash dog park), and then around back again.

Lora and I dressed up like prisoners, and one guy dressed up in his dad's old police uniform from the 80's (wool pants, polyester shirt, the works). Then another guy dressed up like Green Lantern.

We were cool.

Here's a picture of Lora and I. I don't think the other guys signed up for being showcased on my blog (just a hunch) so I hacked them out of the picture.


Try something silly today. If you're a super quiet person, do something you wouldn't normally do, like tell the woman in front of you at the grocery store that you love her shoes. If you have a lot of guts and tend to be on the louder side on average, try a cartwheel down the milk and eggs aisle.

Life isn't all about fun and games, but we certainly need some silliness once in a while.